Tuesday, February 15, 2011

Infectious Disease Spreads at the Playboy Mansion

I am shocked! Over 170 perverts fell ill after attending an "Internet" conference at the Mansion on February 3rd. Symptoms range from fever, to chills, to genital discomfort and discharge. Doctors have not reached a consensus on the illness with theories including Legionnaires Disease and Gonorrhea. Guests pointed to the smelly fog machine as a likely culprit.
Can you imagine how many infectious diseases there are at the Playboy Mansion? The fog machines are perfect for spreading viruses. It's chemical warfare for Chripes Sake! We should send all the playmates to Afghanistan. They could smoke out some caves with the help of open legs and a large fan or simply give Al Queda Syphilis. Why have we not tried this yet? We would have Bin Laden within a week.

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